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Sometimes, we get our noses all bent out of shape with working and trying to do the right thing. We try our best to live up to the QUALITIES OF SUCCESS, we save money like we should, we do good as much as possible, and that’s all a good thing.
Most of the time I spend online is spent at one of a couple of places: I’m either working on FINANCE FOR YOUTH, or I’m at school, trying to finish up my degree work. Sometimes, I go nuts working on one or the other all day long. Don’t get me wrong, I love what I do, and I enjoy the idea of finally meeting a huge goal (school), but sometimes…,
Anyways, a couple of days ago, I was reading the news, and I found a great site. This site is so stupidly funny, and call it exhaustion or call it whatever, but I really dig this site. I’m pretty late to this party, I freely admit. I’ve heard of it before, but the concept seemed so stupid that I passed on it, but I really have to plug (not that they need it) CHUCK NORRIS FACTS. It’s a lot of reading, but there are a lot of funny “facts” about the great martial artist (and “actor”?). Check it out, have some fun!
After I found the site, I couldn’t help but quote a few off for my wife’s (enjoyment?) benefit. I can tell by the look on her face (eyes either closed or rolling to the back of her head, with fingers in both ears, or running out of the room entirely) that she is waiting with bated breath to hear another one.
OBJECTIVITY is one of those QUALITIES OF SUCCESS that really fits in a couple of places. It’s one of those that hasn’t always been easy for me, but one that I have worked hard to live up to at all times. Objectivity is the strict adherence to the TRUTH, not as you would like it to be, not as you want people to believe it, not even as STEPHEN COLBERT FEELS it should be, but as it really is.
For young people, there are a lot of times when you wish truth would fit your definitions, despite everything you know to be true; you wish that you had done your homework on time, you wish that you didn’t have to work to accomplish your goals (or those of your parents), and you wish that life wouldn’t come crashing down on you as soon as you get out of school. I’m not immune to it either; I really wish that I was as good an employee as I think I am. The problem is, I know that I’m not. I know that there are places where I could improve, and that with these improvements my life would be easier.
My parents had a saying when it came to wishing and the truth; it’s actually a vulgar and wildly inappropriate saying, so I won’t repeat it here, but the gist is this: Wishes really have no real substance, and less value than the least valuable of stuff.
The point of objectivity is, to be successful, you have to understand the reality of any situation, and plan accordingly. If you are willing to accept that your wishes, hopes, and dreams are nothing more than this UNLESS you are willing to put in the hard work to realize them, you have a pretty good shot at success. If you aren’t, maybe Qualities of Success isn’t right for you right now.
When working, you have to understand that life is rarely fair. There are going to be times when your wishes will run afoul of reality. Your choice, when this happens (notice I said ‘when’, and not ‘if’), is to accept reality and work within the constraints of reality, or to try and BS your way through, hoping that reality will suspend itself for you. When at work, some things to keep in mind:
1. Not everybody is there to help you. Some people are, but others are there for their own purposes, and still others are going to actively try to screw you over.
2. Not everybody is there to screw you. Some will try, and their success will be based on your willingness to allow them.
3. You might have a better way of doing things, but that doesn’t mean your way will work, or that it will even be attempted.
4. You may think you have a better way of doing things, but you might not be aware of reasons why your way isn’t better.
5. Some people will have more experience than you at something.
6. Some people will claim to have more experience just because they have been there longer.
7. Know the difference between both of these types of people.
8. Most bosses are there to ensure the company is run smoothly, not to make sure you are taken care of.
9. Some bosses will believe that the best way to run a company smoothly is to make sure their employees are well taken care of.
10. No matter what you do for a living, you will experience times when you wish you were doing something else. That’s okay, as long as you think very strongly before making the change.
With money, objectivity isn’t nearly so complicated: You will find people that will tell you that they only way to be financially successful is by investing in x. X may be Real Estate, or it may be Entrepreneurialship, or it may be something entirely different. Objectively, you can be wealthy working in Real Estate, and there are no shortage of entrepreneurs that are wealthy. There are also wealthy actors, athletes, and politicians. There are also plenty of wealthy worker types who just do their job better than everybody else can. Guess who has more wealthy people?
The most important aspect of objectivity is in life, when you have to maintain your objectivity in order to maintain your image, or brand. I’m pretty sure that my methods are the best for young people, but objectively I know that there are some young people who won’t get the most from F4Y. For whatever reason, F4Y isn’t for them. I have to maintain my objectivity and understand that this is the case, and work harder to make sure I’m giving the best information to those that I am reaching, while still maintaining hope that more will come to the fold.
INTEGRITY separates those that are successful from those that might have some money or power. Integrity is the difference between a historical figure and a legend. Integrity is something that you have to have, or you have some serious problems.
When I talk about “experts”, those quotes are there for a reason. I really don’t consider someone to be an expert in personal finance simply because they have the ability to sell a book, or a system, or because they are on TV telling me that my life isn’t as good as theirs. In the past, especially YESTERDAY, I have been critical of some bloggers out there who talk out their doubletalk their way through the subject of personal finance (there is a phrase I’m thinking here, but this is a family friendly blog, after all) and obviously don’t walk their talk. I have the same general problem with other “experts”, who value style over any semblance of substance. These people disgust me.
My entire adult life, I have made (sometimes difficult) decisions about dealing with other people. Some times I made the right choice, and others I royally screwed up whatever I was trying to accomplish. Either way, I have stood up and accepted the consequences for my actions and words. I do this because anything less would be an admission that I have no integrity.
Earlier this year, I got into a lot of trouble at work. I would have been fired, except that my bosses know that I told them the absolute truth, and didn’t try to hedge or lie about what happened. I could have; it would have been really easy. Other employees and clients would have backed me up, and wouldn’t have held it against me. But I wouldn’t have ever been able to look them in the eye again. For me to have lied would have destroyed the meaning for their willingness to back me up. Times where I have been fired, my bosses have always expressed how disappointed they were because they knew that I wouldn’t be replaced by someone with the same level of integrity. Small consolation, but when they say this I do feel a little better.
When you are at work, one important thing for you to remember is that you have to be willing to do as good a job for the worst customers as you do for your favorites. In fact, one could almost say that you shouldn’t have favorites, or that every customer should be your favorite. Practically, I know that everybody will have favorites, and that you will go a little further for these favorites than normal. But you should try.
With people in your life, they need to believe you when you say something. They need to believe in your character, that you are a good and worthy person. You demonstrate this by actions, by helping people when possible, by looking out to make sure that others aren’t being taken advantage of, and by living the QUALITIES OF SUCCESS whenever you can.
Also, don’t be too proud to ask for help when you need it. Doing so will make people look at you with respect, and will make them more willing and even eager to help you. They will also have more respect for your opinions.
The other day, I was talking to a group of young adults about personal finance, and one of them mentioned that there was a person from the bank at their school. They talked about how they [the students] would be really smart and cool if they used the bank’s products to become rich! It seems that a lot of students went home and told their parents that they wanted to take advantage so they wouldn’t be left behind. I’ve worked for institutions that would send a sales rep out to the local schools and colleges to drum up business, so I asked what she talked about. Without going into too many details, the students who took up the bank’s paid representative got royally screwed, and that’s really a shame.
This started me thinking about how young people especially are taken advantage of by so-called “experts”. I see this happen a lot, especially when it comes to personal finance. Throughout the blogosphere, there are bloggers out there who have a good story to tell, some who really know how to “spin a yarn”, and others who have real authority in their topics. Unfortunately, you also have some who don’t know what they are talking about, or those who have a basic grasp of some particular gimmick, but can’t flesh out their blogs with any meaningful way of conveying that message to the masses.
Before this becomes a flame war that I would most certainly lose, let me say that there are, by far, many more good bloggers than bad: All of the blogs on my blogroll are good, and there are many, many more that aren’t up there simply because I haven’t had the time to read through all of them before adding them. This is pretty much for one person, who, even though they are little more than a troll, has the colossal brass ones to believe that they speak with any authority! This person’s claim to “fame” is little more than stealing the ideas of others and putting them on (his or) her blog verbatim!!
People with whom I have had personal conversations about this person have suggested that I just out them for who and what they are, and I have rejected this out of hand for a few reasons; First, I really, REALLY hate being THAT GUY. Look, if you get you’re happy-ya-ya’s by doing this kind of thing, have fun. I’m pretty sure you will eventually feel some very large tooth marks on your backside for your troubles. Second, who knows—somebody might stumble upon their site, and learn something despite themselves! If that’s even a remote possibility, I’m not going to be the guy that screws that up. Third, and this is the most important thing, what if I’m wrong?
In this case, I’m not, but what if I was wrong about this person? Do I really want my brand to be associated with tawdry personal attacks and wrong information? Even knowing I’m right here, is that how I want Finance For Youth to be known? Wouldn’t it be better for F4Y to be known for giving accurate information, and not about blog wars?
With all of that being said, all of us at F4Y want you to make sure that you are getting the best information when it comes to personal finance. When someone gives you advice, think about who’s giving the advice, and what “right” do they have to give you advice? This is a very personal question for you. Are you okay with taking advice from someone who may have practical experience even if they lack training or education? Do you need to hear from someone with a lot of letters at the end of their name, regardless of whether they have been in your situation in the last century or so?
Growing up, my parents placed a really high premium on being the best. They had a lot of sons, and we were constantly compared to each other. That still happens today, but it makes more sense since we are now all adults and on an even playing field. I used to get bothered by the comparisons, and I remember thinking that people shouldn’t have to compete all the time.
When I got my first few jobs, I tried to not compete: I would try to blend in and do enough of the job to keep my job, but not much more. Because of my upbringing, this became very difficult to maintain, and I would naturally become more competitive. When this started happening, I realized that I was becoming the best at which ever job I was doing.
Fast-forward a few years, and I’m a fairly new teller at a bank. I’m the fastest teller in the branch, and I’ve won several awards for being most efficient, friendliest, and others. I find myself in line for a promotion to the New Accounts Area. I ace the interview, and get the job! Not long after, I find out that I really sucked at New Accounts. I was too fast, and not as friendly as I was as a teller. My boss calls me in for a progress report, and we talk about the issue. He told me that he was disappointed, because I had all the traits and talent necessary to be one of the best, but for some reason, I was barely mediocre. Over the next few weeks, we figured out that I was still operating like a teller, and had fallen into a comfort zone that would have been excellent as a teller, but just wasn’t cutting it in my new position.
That’s the funny thing about EXCELLENCE, is that it always changes. There’s nothing wrong with being the best there is at what you do, and there is certainly nothing wrong with pursuing excellence, but you have to understand that you will probably never catch it. And if, for some reason you do, the bar will instantly be set higher for you to try to achieve it again.
But what constitutes excellence? I have always thought that doing the right thing while still doing the correct thing is pretty close. I know, those thoughts seem like the same thing, but they aren’t. Eventually, you will see the difference. Excellence is also about challenging yourself at all times to improve. Let’s get it out in the open and say that you will never reach perfection. I’ll never come close to it. The truth is; I really don’t want to. Once I get there, then what? How do I improve on that?
For your purposes, try to be THE BEST. Try to be perfect. Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t get there, but never stop trying. One of the ways to help your pursuit is to follow the QUALITIES OF SUCCESS. Once you’ve gotten to the point where you are living them, you will see how much fun resetting the bar towards increased personal productivity can be.
